If you’re in a codependent relationship and choose to stay with your partner, remember that Recovery is possible. Codependency is nothing to be ashamed of, but it is something you’ll both need to address. After eliminating your codependent behaviors, you can work toward a healthy relationship where both people feel equally valued.
Here are a few of the many steps you can take to overcome codependency:
Assert yourself: In any relationship, both people’s needs should be of equal importance. Be honest about your wants with both yourself and your partner. By changing your mindset and caring for yourself as much as you care for your partner, you can open the door for change in your relationship.
Spend time apart: Not only is it completely normal for both partners to have lives outside of their relationship, but it’s also extremely healthy. Feel free to go out with friends, take up a hobby or spend time by yourself. Doing so may be difficult for both of you at first, but it’s essential in freeing yourself from the control your partner has over your life.
Get treatment: Addiction can be beyond your or your partner’s control. If you talk to your partner about going to counseling, you can both receive the help you need for growth and Recovery. You’ll both also learn how to handle any co-existing disorders like depression and PTSD, which can exacerbate addiction and fuel destructive behaviors in both the taker and the giver.
Seek help in processing your childhood: Codependency is significantly linked to childhood trauma. To overcome your current codependency, you and your therapist should pinpoint any part of your past that continues to contribute to your current behavior.
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